Saturday, April 11, 2009

Had to get it off my chest

This post is for myself and not to make anyone feel bad.... This probably wont make much since sorry no proper anything sorry.. WARNING T.. M.. I.. ahead.



Wednesday March 25Th we found out we were expecting number 4. I didn't quite know how to feel about it. We didn't tell many people. And still probably wouldn't say anything but I just can't wrap my brain around what is going on . And Knowledge is power...

My heart wasn't fully into being pregnant right now. Yes babies are great and adding to our family is always exciting. But I was just trying to get everything from everyone else in our family and myselfs stuff put back together. But I was warming up to the idea I could still work out through the pregnancy and not be put behind by it.

April 9Th was my first OB appointment I couldn't shack this very nervous feeling. Robert was with me and very excited. The nurse came in and did all the vitals and confirmed that yes we were indeed pregnant. Then the nurse practitioner came in and did all the examines. Everything looked OK until she did the breast examine she said oh you have a couple lumps we will be keeping a close eye on as they could be normal or could be something abnormal.

Then the ultrasound tech came in and did that. At first we all thought it was twins but then she started looking more and more closely. Then called the doctor in to talk to us. So hello we have now seen I think everyone in the office right. So he comes in and goes OK there are two things. First is that you have a cyst on your right ovary and that could or could not mean that you just ovulated on that side. But we will have to watch it. Then he goes now about the twin thing it isn't twins it is one and a blood clot in your uterus now here is what could happen the baby could outgrow the blood clot and make the body just absorb it or the body can chose to eliminate the whole pregnancy to get the clot out. We were shocked. And still really have no answers to why or how a clot forms. But I have been put on limited activity and also on a hormone to help. We are hoping and praying that in two weeks when we go back that the baby has grown and not the blood clot.

So right now the whole house is dealing with a emotional roller coaster for a mom. We know that whatever is supposed to happen will.

Thanks for reading and sorry it isn't something fun and exciting.

~Julia